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 Wolf was born in San Francisco, California in 1962. Her father, Leonard Wolf, is an author. She attended Lowell High School and debated in regional speech tournaments as a member of the Lowell Forensic Society. She attended Yale University, where she received in 1984 her Bachelor of Arts in English literature; she was a Rhodes Scholar at New College, Oxford from 1985 to 1987.
Wolf was married to the former Clinton speechwriter David Shipley, with whom she has two children, Rosa and Joseph. The two divorced in 2005.
In 2006, the Sunday Herald carried an interview in which Wolf claimed to have taken on the spirit of a 13-year-old boy and saw Jesus Christ. The paper called her comments "more than a little disturbing," and Salon magazine called the confession "truly outlandish.
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